Day 22

Last night i had a dream. Yes i really dreamt. It wasnt a ordinary dream, it was a horrible one. The dreamt was about me giving up my life for her just to make her realise how much i really love her. It happened when we were sitting in the back of the car, when it start to move off after the lights turn green. A vehicle from the right didnt stop for the red and move on and crash into our car. I only could remember i hugged her just to shield her from all the impact. Next moment i was lying in her arms and she was her crying to me how much she loves me and all. I know is kind of crap, but is true. Is it a deja-vu? I slept at one plus and the dream woke me up at two plus, could not sleep well from then on. Toss and turn till five plus and i gave up my sleep to play computer game till 730am. I cant concentrate on anything i do at all. She is the only main thing on my mind now. Nothing else matters to me, be it my own health or what. Everything is about her and her and her. I cant stop thinking and worrying about her. Haii. My body and mind are tired of all this, but i cant stop it at all. I am a living zombie trying to get through each day and is just isnt easy at all. I am breaking down each day. Same old questions keep pondering in my brain. I cant forgive myself for what i have done. Lesson learnt is that when chances are given to you for you to change, you have to change it wholehearted. Dont be so insensible to your loved one, show her more attention and concern. She isnt as happy as she looks, you have to break the code of the padlock to her troubles. Lesson learnt will she come back to me? I doubt so. Why all this harsh treatment? Tell me when she will be mine?