Hopelessly Helpless

There isn't much time left and yet i cant do anything about it. Why?? I ask her if she can accompany me go office and ask about the pay and maybe follow me see sinseh. She say cant, she got something on. She attending M birthday. She sacrifice her studies to attend his birthday, when i ask her to accompany a while she rejected. I am simply useless, cant do anything at all. I am worried about her studies. She set a target, i want her to hit it. But everything now simply affects her a lot. I am worried that she cant hit it and will be restless, angry and blame it all on herself. I am worried for her health, scare she will fall sick at this point of time. Wednesday mark the day i need to go back to the specialist for my nose review, i am afraid of the results. Be it positive or negative, i am afraid. Now that i injured my back i have more things to worried about. I have to go through all this pain alone. She means everything to me, and she cant be there for me. I have to go through all this without her. I know i cant be there for her when she needed me the most, when she got an eye infection. Now i getting the taste of it. I regretted everything i done to her last time. I am not as strong as she thinks that i am. I am useless. Why i cant do anything at all. Why?? Simply heartbreaking that i cant do much at all. I am very worried about her and all i can do is care for her. Why it has to be like this? I love her a lot, with words it is difficult to explain the love i felt for her, i cant do anything much to help her. I am just hopelessly helpless. This world don't matter to me anymore i will give it all up for her, so that i can breathe the same air as her till the day i die.